anyone wanna help me straighten out my priorities?

week three is done. of course, i am behind. i've had too much other stuff on my mind as of late to devote the time and attention that i should. next week i am turning over a new leaf. i have too. or else i am going to fail miserable at this whole library school thing.

so my archives class is going pretty well. the syllabus lists many, many readings but to my delight i learned that only about 1/3 of them are actually required. the rest are just recommended. i am actually keeping up with my readings for this class. i also have to give a short presentation in the near future so i'm working on that currently. i think i will wear my cute librarian shirt that day. (see what's important to me? not the presentation or the content or what the hell i'm gonna say but rather my attire. hum. are my priorities straight? probably not).

in class this week my most dreaded classmate sat next to me. i don't want to be rude but this lady may just be the death of me. she is in another one of my classes too and she is even more clueless in there! i hate how she mutters continuously under her breath throughout the entire lecture. maybe if you got there on time lady you could sit up front! ugh! why is she there? why will KSU allow this woman into their program when she doesn't even know how to minimize a window on the computer? seriously.

the photo class is going really well although i feel like i'm being self-taught. the last hour or so of class we just fuck around in photo shop. i know some things but there are many more i do not and am not familiar with at all. she doesn't really explain all of the tools but i have the photo shop guru (you know who you are - don't pretend you're not above the rest of us lobster girl!) and she is very friendly and helpful. one of these days i will hopefully have more than $3 in my wallet and we can actually get a drink after class. we turned in our first assignment and i think i did ok. not great. but ok. i will do better and spend more time on the next one. oh, that's due next week. shit. when will i ihave time for that? "but you have all weekend lizette." my retort - my weekends are for drinkin' not photo shoppin'. (hence why i am such a great graduate student. ha!)

my rare books class is also going well. it is actually pretty interesting. although, i think it is a rather snobbish arena. not the class but the whole profession surrounding rare books. don't get me wrong - i appreciate a good incunabula but that doesn't take away from the fact that people who deal solely with rare books have an air about them. it is true. i said it. the readings for this class.....not so much. i've only read a few and they were mind numbing. i actually fell asleep wednesday night on my couch (sitting up) while reading one about descriptive bibliography. then of course she calls on me to answer a question thursday morning and i had to be the asshole that said, "sorry but i have no idea." oh well. you can't win 'em all.

the semester long project in this class is some work. mostly cuz i have to do it at the library and i'm gonna be dealing with microfilm. yuck. i hate that stuff. what a horrible idea that stuff was. "hey here's a whole book on this lighted screen that will make your retinas bleed and your head pulse and ache. what a great preservation tool." ugh. we also had to make appointments to go up to special collections and deal with our books but the only time that would work for me is 7:00-9:00 am. ohmigoodness. who am i kidding? like i can get to KSU by 7:00 am. i'm not sure what i was thinking on that one. i did feel rushed to decide. class was ending and three more people after me had to sign up. i was pressured. i may reconsider.

driving around the KSU campus and seeing all of the undergrads in sweats lugging huge backpacks around make me realize how much older and wiser i am now as a graduate student - how far i've come. well, wiser in the ways of the world. i think i am wiser anyways. here is a story about my undergraduate career. the day before my very first day of college i cried and threw up. i was terrified. for the first few semesters i sat in the back of the room in the far corner as far away from everyone as possible. i never spoke to a soul unless i had to. i ate lunch in my car by myself and then headed to work right from school. i was miserable. totally miserable. i was scared to meet new people, scared to try new things, and stuck in a small town mindset. thank god i broke out of it. by the end i had made friends, knew people around campus, had a student assistant job, ate lunch with others, and actually volunteered to speak out in class. the same rings true now. yea, i am not at my dream school in my dream program but i think i'm doing ok. i'm going to get involved with some student organizations and network and what not. i think i'm on the right track.